Wednesday, January 11, 2012

That Pesky Mote

Okay, so I've been thinking about this and pondering this for quite a few days. Wondering if I should post about this topic and stick my neck out, so to speak. I guess, for obvious reasons because you are reading this, that I have decided to write it and publish it.

Apparently there has been quite a brouhaha going on over at Mormon Mommy Bloggers** regarding an upcoming chat with Sister Julie B. Beck, president of the Relief Society of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. The blog owners are going to have a chance to visit with her and gave the invitation to anyone to post questions, nothing is taboo.  I believe that this chat will be tomorrow, the 12th.  There was an explosion of responses, of which I only stuck around to read a couple of pages worth.

Actually the first question was this:
"I really would like to know how to push my husband to be a better man without pushing him. I know he is capable of so much more, but I don't want to force him to do it."

The responses were instantaneous and a lot of them not so kind. I must confess, my first reaction was, "well of all the nerve!"

But after cooler heads prevailed, and I had a chance to think about it, I defy any Mormon married woman, in fact ANY married woman to deny, in fact, that she has had the exact same thoughts at one point or another in her marriage. (sheepishly I raise my hand)  If you haven't had those thoughts, well, you are a better woman than me or you just haven't had them yet. I think this young woman is sincere in her intent.

So if I were Sister Beck, how would I answer that question?  Of course I am absolutely an expert on how she would answer this question because of course I was able to attend two meetings with her a couple of months ago...............(hoping you are getting the tongue in cheek here)

I imagine that Sister Beck would ask us to search the scriptures and find the answer. I think that depending on the person's needs in life, the scripture might be different for everyone.  This is the scripture that came to my mind first,
"And why beholdest thou the mote that is in thy brother’s eye, but considerest not the beam that is in thine own eye?"
Matthew 7:3
In other words, remember that old saying, "when you point a finger at someone else, there are three more pointing back at you.......(unless you have had a traumatic finger amputation or a birth defect)

I guess my point here is that we need to focus on our own spirituality, our own growth and development and our own repentance first before we go off and start yanking out those pesky motes in other people's eyes. I know that I am much happier when I follow this counsel. I have learned by sad experience that when I get all worked up about someone else's faults, and try to do something about it in my own way, it pretty much backfires and relationships suffer.

So that's my two cent's worth.
I'm going to respond to another comment made in a few days.......

Google's link function is working.....go here if you want to read it.


Momza said...

Marilyn, you are so right. I'd posted two comments on that blog and then wished I never had because my responses were not popular ones. The negativity was so disheartening. I am looking forward to Sister Beck's response tomorrow.

Amy said...

You brought up the subject very nicely, Mom. Much better than I did. I um, got a little ranty and had some pretty negative comments and even a rather nasty blog post by someone else. It prompted me to post a more loving response.
At first I was VERY upset by it. But I'm starting to kinda feel like I'm getting somewhere with my blog. Nothing like a little controversy to get more readers. ha ha ha.

Granny J said...

I like your thoughts and Momza's and Amy's ...I sorta lurked on Amy's blog. I think the word that got me worked up with the question was "push"...and I think of the "wet noodle"! I hate being pushed but don't mind being encouraged, entreated, worked with, etc. So I do a lot of encouraging...sometimes with wonderful results and at other times less than satisfactory to me. Whose to say I'm right?... ;)

Momzoo said...

oooo, nice, pulling the mote out of my eye...thanks :)