What my Garden has Taught me

This photo was taken about six weeks ago.
It looks vastly different now.
Almost everything green has shriveled and died and is roasting comfortably in the compost pile.

Some things were failures, some things were successes.
I have a difficult time growing things in the late spring/summer here.
But I have that gardener's optimism that next time it will be better.

We found a fabulous place for compost.
For the Locals--Singh's Farm east of the 101 and Thomas Road.
It's like a Garden of Eden oasis in the middle of the city.
While walking on a foot of spongy, soft compost.

When I was in Utah early in the summer,
I visited my Dad's neighbor across the street.
He showed me his garden.
It was gorgeous, just starting, he had plants that I will never be able to grow in AZ.

And I realized that it was time to stop comparing my garden to others.
He has different soil, different climate, different watering needs, different everything.
And I needed to be content with my little patch.
And continue to "grow" and learn within my own sphere of experience.

Wouldn't that be a little bit like life?

Pensive & Reflective

Pensive     (pen-siv)    adj.

dreamily or wistfully thoughtful.

Reflective (ri-flek-tiv)  adj.

syn.  contemplative, meditative, thoughtful.


I woke up this morning with this kind of mood, I suppose perhaps because I have a raw and burning throat and all my carefully laid plans for today are like the house of cards that collapses with the mere breath of wind. And also perhaps because my youngest offspring is in way worse shape than me, sleeping off the effects of her latest Nyquil dose....She's been burning the candle at both ends. She's learned how from the master of course.

So today I think I'll back off, pay the bills, like any dutiful house manager does on the 1st of the month, do some reading, take a nap and think of something reaallly easy for dinner.

I'm feeling reflective because two important anniversaries have come to pass and I've been doing some reflecting.

A year ago today I was called to be the Relief Society president of a small Spanish branch. To say that I was surprised is a gross understatement, although I had spiritual inklings ahead of time, to which I immediately dismissed as being a load of crock..........

I was used to being in the background, happily leading the music, learning the language, enjoying the people and staying in the shadows.

I suppose if I had been called to be the president in my own English speaking ward, I could have girded up my loins, fresh courage take, like my pioneer ancestors, and done just fine.

But this....this has reduced me to a puddle of humanity, literally, and forced me to my knees pleading for help on many, many, many occasions.  I used to cry before every meeting and visit.  I wished I could just make it go away many times.

But what have I learned?  I've learned that Divine Help is always available. I've learned I can do some hard things even though I don't want to. I have learned more about what it means to have the gift of tongues....to feel a conduit of light and inspiration literally flowing from above into my heart and brain and out of my mouth. I've learned that God loves me and my sisters. I've been awed and humbled at the faith of people who sometimes don't know where their next meal is coming from, who fear for their safety at times and are subject to ridicule and discrimination. I love them for their infinite patience with me, trying to muddle through the language and sweetly correcting my mistakes. I love their abrazos and beautiful dark eyes and glossy dark hair. And their kids....oh wow....such beautiful babies!

So I'll close for now, drink a cuppa echinacea tea, and report on my other anniversary tomorrow. One must have another blog topic waiting in the wings........

God Knows each of Us

I believe that God knows each of us by name.

He knows our needs, wants and the deepest desires of our hearts.

Why?

Last week I had just returned home from a yoga class.

Dressed in my saggy yoga pants.

White socks and goofy slippers.

When I received a call from my husband that a blessing was needed.

Would I send my son to the nearby hospital

To assist in giving a priesthood blessing?

Sure.

I relayed the message.

And then I stopped and had a thought.

I really should go with them and check in on one of my dear sisters

Who has been in the hospital, recovering from surgery.

I ran after my son,

In my saggy yoga pants,

white socks and goofy slippers.

After the blessing was given, we rode upstairs to the fifth floor.

Entered the room quietly and hesitantly.

And saw my dear little sister sitting, propped up in a chair, looking forlorn

in front of her lunch

which she was trying to gag down.

Her face brightened, and she spoke of her pains, her family and her future plans.

Then a doctor entered.

Brisk and professional.

A very nice man, to be sure, but with a different accent than ours.

He checked her over, speaking rapidly.

We began to translate for her,

making sure she understood what he said, and he understood what she said.

Then he left.

She looked up at us with tear-filled eyes,

and began to praise God for her many blessings

at this difficult time in her life,

and especially at the exact moment that He sent us there

to help her understand and communicate with a busy doctor.

And I almost missed it.

Because of my saggy yoga pants

white socks and goofy slippers.

And that's how I know that God knows us each by name.

Greg Olsen art

What is the funnest thing about being the Relief Society President?

Getting a phone call from someone who says, "I would like to help a member of your branch have a Merry Christmas." Seeing wonderful people step forward and lend a helping hand to those who are less fortunate.

Anonymously.

What a joy this has been for me this Christmas season.

....."Verily I say unto you, Inasmuch as ye have done it unto one of the least of these my brethren, ye have done it unto me."

Matthew 25:40

Tender Mercy #6294

Lately I've been trying to focus on the little tender mercies that happen throughout my days and give thanks to Heavenly Father for his kind and watchful care. They are not big things, not "Today I'm grateful I didn't get hit by a bus," just the little things."

Like last week, I was sewing frantically and realized that I was missing a small piece of fabric necessary to finish a project. In dismay, I got ready to set it aside, when I noticed that in my craziness, I had accidently cut an extra piece of the same project! It was just what I needed to finish up without having to make an extra trip to the store-halfway across town-to pick up the fabric!

Tender mercy ♥♥♥♥

Two weeks ago, I had to teach the Relief Society lesson, not in my native language. Being the president, I have to do this every three months and it literally strikes terror into my heart for weeks beforehand. But when I taught the lesson, I could feel the words coming into me and flowing out of my mouth. It was an incredible experience!

Tender mercy ♥♥♥♥♥

Today I was running around, trying to get some Christmas shopping done. While sitting in the parking lot of a store, I was on the phone with a very unhelpful 411 operator, trying to find the phone number of another store I had never been to. I finally gave up, and went into store and completed my Christmas purchase. When I came out, I couldn't find my car keys! ----Guess where they were? In the car......with the door unlocked..... My car was still there, nothing was taken......all was well.

Tender mercy ♥♥♥♥

Today receiving an absolutely fabulous letter from our Elder Bubba D, addressed to his sister, which she read to me.....Wow.....it was a letter every parent hopes to get-sent to his sister-but amazing nontheless, full of testimony and brotherly advice.......

Tender mercy ♥♥♥♥♥

The challenge is to find those tiny tender mercies every day, that keep us going and let us know that God is ever mindful of us.....

A Feast Without the Calories

This was stolen from Joy For Your Journey, a little Food 4 Thought.....


Breakfast

What is your favorite menu item you will eat at your Thanksgiving Feast?

It's a tossup between the "stuffing" and the chiffon pumpkin pie, all treasured recipes handed down to me from my mother. I have memories of the delicious smell of onions, celery and shredded carrots simmering in about a pound of butter prior to their addition to the bread crumbs. Also, I don't really like traditional baked pumpkin pie, but my grandmother's chiffon pumpkin pie is a must-have every year. It's light and fluffy and full of delicious cinnamony-ness.

Lunch

What are you most grateful for at THIS moment?

I'm grateful for our Heavenly Father's great plan of happiness. Last night our dear niece lost a baby that they had been working so hard to get. In order to preserve her life, the baby had to be sacrificed. I'm so grateful for the peace and comfort of the gospel and the knowledge we have of eternal life and that families are forever. We can have peace in the midst of pain, through the love of our Savior, Jesus Christ. We love you, J & M!

Dinner

What is different about Thanksgiving this year?

We will miss a bunch of our family members, our Elder Bubba D, shivering in Alaska, our son Rick's family, kind of shivering in Utah, but having a grand time and our Amy's family, visiting the in-laws. But we have the addition of our son, the former Elder Steve, his first Thanksgiving home in two years, and get to enjoy los Elderes and our Grandpa's company.

Midnight Snack

Where are you spending Thanksgiving this year and what part of the menu are you preparing?

Here en la casa de Madwoman. I'm cooking pretty much everything except rolls, green beans, jello....and what else are you bringing Jess?

Recipe of the week

Press forward. (see 2 Nephi 31:20)

Listen to Your Inner Voice

Nearly three weeks ago, I ventured out to get my annual mammogram. Really, no big deal people. It's not that bad. Except this time, as the technician was manipulating and stretching and poking on the left side, I began to feel distinctly uneasy.

I brushed it off and went on my way, feeling smug for checking off the necessary evil for again another year.

Then two days later, the phone call. I needed to go back for another check, on the left side, plus an additional ultrasound. Earliest available appointment, ten days away.

My heart stopped. Tears flowed. A frantic call to my mother, and my aunt, who is a breast cancer survivor. (don't we always think the worst!!!)

Sorry kids, I didn't tell you. This is the first time most of them are hearing about this.

After the panic subsided, I listened to my inner voice......
It said, "it's probably ok, but if there is something there, it isn't going to go away and it won't do you any good to fuss over it."

So I listened. I lived my life but I asked my husband and son to give me a blessing the day before. How grateful I am for worthy men in my life!

The time arrived. The technician was compassionate. She explained that the earlier xray had not been clear. The tissue was "wadded up" and she needed a little more detailed look for the radiologist. If the first xray was good, then I wouldn't need the ultrasound.

Burden slightly lighter.
Why didn't they tell me on the phone in the first place? It would have saved some unnecessary worrying....

Xray completed and I shuffle off to wait in a tiny room while the dr. looks at the xray. I can go if all is well.

Three minutes later, the welcome words, "you're good to go! It's all normal tissue."

The air whooses out of my lungs. My burden is lifted.

Listen to your inner voice.
My voice was "uneasy" during the first xray. The technician wasn't as careful as she should have been. My inner voice later assured me that all would be well.

Listen to your inner voice, or by whatever name you may call it....The Holy Spirit, The Holy Ghost, your conscious........

It will guide you. It has guided me many, many, many times......
It is a gift from God.

That inner voice.

Thank You

A heartfelt thanks today to those who fought so that I could have the freedoms I have today.
Many made the ultimate sacrifice.

Our hearts were wrenched this year close to home when one of our own in our ward (local LDS congregation) gave up his life in Alfghanistan two months ago. My heart goes out to his sweet young wife, his little girl, and his beloved parents and brothers. He didn't have to go, he didn't have to be where he was, but because of the kind of man he is, he faced great danger and paid the ultimate sacrifice.

Thank you SO much. May God bless your family and bring them sweet comfort this day.


Happy Anniversary to the Standages!

Living Water

"There cometh a women of Samaria to draw water: Jesus saith unto her, Give me to drink. (For his disciples were gone away unto the city to buy meat.) Then saith the woman of Samaria unto him, How is it that thou, being a Jew, askest drink of me, which am a woman of Samaria? for the Jews have no dealings with the Samaritans. Jesus answered and saith unto her, If thou knewest the gift of God and who it is that saith to thee, Give me to drink; thou wouldest have asked of him, and he would have given thee living water. The woman saith unto him, Sir, thou hast nothing to draw with, and the well is deep; from whence then hast thou that living water?.....Jesus answered and said unto her, Whosoever drinketh of this water shall thirst again. But whosoever drinketh of the water that I shall give him shall never thirst; but the water that I shall give him shall be in him a well of water springing up into everlasting life." John 4:7-14

Water has a powerful affect on us. I came realize this the last few days as we watched Amy suffer agonizing pains and gradually become sicker and sicker. She had been released from the hospital mid morning on Tues. with powerful painkillers and she spent all day wretchedly ill and the rest of us feeling full of despair for her. The soonest her surgeon could see her was the following MONDAY morning! Finally late Tues. night, her husband said, "enough is enough...we are going back to the hospital!" Hours later, and to make a looonnnggg story short, she had a miraculous recovery. What was the problem?

Dehydration.

Lack of fluid in her body.

We went to a different hospital, and after a discussion, they realized she had not taken any fluids in nearly 36-48 hours! After two bags of IV fluids, she was a totally different person-pain free, nausea free, and she had come back to us! Water is a necessary and vital component of our lives-lack of it is life-threatening!

As I lay in bed later that night (early morning), I had a powerful lesson taught to me.

Just as water is vital to our physical bodies, "living water" is vital to our spiritual selves. How long can I go without water in my body? Only a few days. How long can I go without "living water" for my spiritual body? The same. Do I recognize the signs and symptoms of spiritual "dehydration?" They may be more subtle and difficult to recognize, but they are there nonetheless.

"Yea, if they will come, they may, and partake of the waters of life freely." D&C 10:66

The invitation is issued, the Arms are always extended.

We must accept the invitation and "drink freely."